broadaxes | (no subject)

[Johanna laughs too, a bit of a bray than a laugh. She closes her eyes as Annie moves her fingers through her hair, feeling safe for the first time in a long time. It's nice.]

Driftwood is really cool. The water's curved and formed it. District Four and Seven could get along pretty well. I might take some of it home with me, carve you a mermaid.

[Johanna's mother worked her fingers down carving furniture for the wealthier inhabitants of Seven. Her father was a lumberjack, and her brothers worked in the paper factory. Well-- they did, until Johanna refused to be a prostitute. Knowing that's what they did to Victors, Johanna felt sorry for Finnick. And Jo doesn't feel sorry for anyone. She went into mama bear mode. Maybe that's why she's so fond of Annie-- their connection, Finnick.]

I'll eat fish, I'll watch you fish, but I won't fish. And nah, you can't hurt me, Annie.

Oh! [Annie exclaims dreamily, a light giggle escaping.] Yes, please. I would like that. Very much. It'll go on the mantle.

[She and Finnick kept a mantle- the tridents he'd used in his games were proudly displayed, along with Annie's knives and their crowns. There was a picture of Annie's family there, and Finnick's, Mags, her District partner. For a long time, the display had made Annie sad, and she'd more than once torn everything down. But now, she recognized it as an altar to those that had made them who they were. What made them so strong.]

Why won't you fish?

[She rubs her fingers along Johanna's scalp, massaging gently.] Don't be so sure.

[There's that soft smile that only Finnick and Annie get to see. It makes sense that they found each other and they're the only ones Johanna lets in. They're alike in one way or another, they have the same shape. Fit right into her heart.

Johanna had seen the mantle. It was a nice thought, but Johanna felt nothing for disdain. She decided bite back the words about it being nicer to look at than what's up there now.]

I don't know, I don't like killing living things. Not since-- Not since I did already, you know. Trees are alive. They breath.

[Johanna wasn't wrong.]

Oh.

[her fingers start to make work of Johanna's short, curly hair, weaving her hair back and out of her face.] I understand.

[Fish were food. They weren't your friends, Annie was raised to know that. But she'd been raised to kill children like the rest of the Careers. And she'd done it.

Like she killed the tribute from 7 that had decapitated her district partner.]

Uhm... Well, maybe we'll have salad?

[Johanna saw Annie kill the kid from Seven. She knew that kid. But she didn't hold it against this girl, especially now while she was cradling her in such a vulnerable state.

Johanna killed three kids in her games. Only three. But she still won. In the Quell, she killed only one more. She wanted to keep her counts low. She remembered waiting them out in the woods and starving, hoping they would all kill each other first. By the time she was in the Quell, she kind of didn't care. She did now that it was over, and was glad there wasn't more blood on her hands.]

No, Annie, we can have fish. I just ... you catch mine for me? I'm not good at it. I'll make the fire. I'm not one of those veggie people. We have steer in Seven. I eat meat.

[Annie had, in the end, killed four. She'd killed someone in the blood bath, the girl from seven, a boy from ten, she her final competitor- a girl from two.

To say nothing for peacekeeper she'd stabbed during her time being held in the Capitol.

Or all of those she'd gotten killed on her behalf- her mother, father, brother. Mags. Her district partner, Sebastian. Their blood was on her hands, too.]

If you want. You know there aren't many cows here. I'll fish for you.

[They really must have been stupid to bring in kids straight from the Quarter Quell, or former victors. They knew how to fight, how to kill, when to strike. Johanna didn't kill a peacekeeper when they dragged her into the Tribute center. But he certainly wasn't okay after that.]

Okay, you can fish for me.

[She looks over at Annie and smiles. A real smile, not one of her faking it smiles, or one of her evil little grins. A genuine one.]

Thank you, Annie. I know... [How much she meant to Finnick.]

Okay. Promise.

[There's something in the smile that makes Annie smile brighter, the whole room feel a bit lighter.]

No, no thanks. I don't need them. [She lets one hand dip into the water, gently playing with the bubbles.] We're friends. But thank you. [It was still an important gesture. She returns her hands to Johanna's hair, working to finish the braids off.]

Your hair is so pretty.

[Johanna always ignored compliments. They were usually someone trying to sweet talk her. And as a kid, she was gawky and weird.]

I have my daddy's hair. My mom would braid it for me all the time. It was the only way to keep it from flying away.

[She sounds a little sad but quickly changes to focus on Annie.]

Red is way better. It's firey. It's unique. The cameras probably loved you.

[One hand comes up out of the water to twirl a finger in a chunk of Annie's hair closest to Johanna from the tub. She twirls it up like a piece of pasta and then lets it go.]

[Annie giggles softly at the mental image.] It's good hair. I like it.

She shakes her head, ducking it slightly so her hair covers her face. Her hair was a shield for her, a comfort item. It's nice for Johanna to touch it so softly. She shrugs.]

They said I was beautiful. [Finnick had said she was beautiful. Finnick, whom she'd fallen for just like all the other girls. and he'd fallen for her, somewhere between the reaping and her victory tour.] But strange. I-- I've always been... [She takes one hand off of Johanna's hair to tap her temple lightly.] Always been off. Not who you really want from Four. A disappointment. [She had started cracking under the pressure almost immediately, freezing up in her Interview for what felt like an eternity.

She was the Victor people wanted to forget.]

They must have been proud of you, though.

Who? The Capitol? My parents were proud, sure, but not for long. The Capitol loved me, they loved what an actress I was.

[Johanna brushes Annie's curtain of hair back a little so she can at least see her lips when she spoke.]

You are beautiful. I can see what Finnick saw in you. He said... he said you crept up on him. So maybe not at first, but your sneaky ass got him.

[She smiles wide, all incisors. Johanna hopes Annie knows she's joking.]

Besides, we're all crazy now.

Mine, too.

[But she remembers the look in their eyes when they spoke to her for the first time after her games, and realized just how different things were going to be now that their only daughter was, as they were calling it, crazy.

They didn't have to swim in their disappointment for long.]

Oh shush! I thought- I had a big crush on him. All the girls did. But I met him and thought-- thought he was just flirting with me to give me hope. [Everything surrounding her games is fuzzy, but she remembers calling Finnick out on it on the train.

She remembers his arms around her the night before she entered the Arena.]

No- not like me, at least.

[The water makes that beautiful little swoosh when Johanna moves in the tub, drawing closer to the edge. The tub is huge, very fancy, too fancy. It's what she's become accustomed to. But that's not the point. The point is that she grabs the porcelain edge and lifts herself up a little. Her small breasts have rivulets of water rushing downwards. In a very uncharacteristic movement, Johanna quickly reaches out to kiss Annie quickly on the lips. It could really mean anything. Friendship. The beginnings of something else. Pity. The kind of love you have for a daughter. So many things.]

You're not crazy, Annie. You're just fine.

[Johanna is beautiful. She's one of those women that's even more beautiful naked. Annie's lips part for a moment in surprise as she looks up at the woman in front of her.

Her lips are unexpected, and her green eyes fly open. When Johanna pulls back, Annie stays, hovering, looking at her as she goes through the moment over and over again in her head, trying to figure out exactly what had just happened.

It was a good kiss. Friendly, warm, caring. Loving.]

You're fine, too.

[Johanna cracks a smile. She wasn't sure why she did it, but it was a good reaction. Sometimes she did things to see how good they'd feel, or how bad they'd hurt.]

We're so fucked up, Annie. The Arena messed us up good. It's okay to admit it. But we're still fine. Fucked up but not ... broken.

[Johanna used the word 'broken' many times in her sessions with her therapist-- recently, not back when she was in thirteen. In thirteen, she just lied and laughed and screamed at him.]

[Annie looks away, pushing some of her hair back in front of her face just barely. Mostly, it's just to feel something grounding.]

No. I broke. Everyone saw.

[Johanna swishes around in the tub. It's large enough and she's small enough to sit sideways and look at Annie. She holds onto the lip of the tub, crossing her legs under her.]

It's braver to do what you did, Annie. To show emotion in this place... it's a big deal.

[She presses her lips together, looking back down at the water, at the tile floor.]

Thought... everyone thought I was weak.

[Johanna shakes her head.]

Only the fuckin' dumb and mean people thought that.

[There's something so wonderfully blunt about Johanna that's got Annie grinning, laughing. It's easier to understand things, in the long run, when they're put bluntly. Johanna understands that. Johanna doesn't treat her like a child.]

No! [But she's smiling, hoping it's true.]